Pushing the bump around!

Last weekend when we walked into our favourite restaurant for lunch, we were told we had to wait. It was nearly 3 then and though I had munched after breakfast, the growls were slowly setting in. I smiled and said, of course we would! They were sweet enough to bring us all chairs to sit on…but about 10 minutes later I was at the edge of the seat! I stood up, looked around for an empty table…growl, growl, growl…the bump was about to throw a fit any minute! Thankfully, the table was soon found and I didn’t have to push the bump ahead! 

I am what you would say a woman who has never taken advantage of being one! I mean, I am pushy but I am not pushy just because I am a woman. For instance, I don’t get into a bus or a metro and expect men to get up from their seats. Though there was a time when I’d stare so hard that the man sitting on a woman’s seat would almost melt under the glare! In most cases, I’d expect the man to stand up for a woman who needs it…an aged, infirm elder or even a pregnant woman. If the man turned out to be an imbecile, insensitive man I’d make myself heard! And it worked…

Today, the tables have turned and I find myself at the other end. For someone who has been so independent all her life, I am not comfortable pushing the bump around. I don’t like men holding the door for me. I don’t like someone walk slow for me. I don’t like it when someone offers to come over to my desk instead of me walking over! I don’t like the expressions that silently say, “Oh, it’s okay, she is pregnant!” I am not pushing the envelope here, and I am definitely not saying that having the bump has not changed anything about me. It has…and yes a lot! But despite all the changes in my body and mind, this is one trait that I find difficult to overcome. 

Yesterday, our driver quit. It’s my last month at work and I won’t be needing a driver from August onwards. But there is still this one month of office that I will attend…Aniruddha is upset that we don’t have a driver…our parents are paranoid too! But I know I can manage this last leg…it’s not that I am in the 9th month and I can’t get behind the wheel! Thankfully, my car has been built for a woman with a bump! I am a safe driver, I buckle up and maintain my speed. I know I will be fine…but then the question creeps in…am I being too hard on myself? I have had friends read my journal and say how they’ve had to cook and take public transport all their nine months, and that I am lucky! I know, I am. But I cannot settle for an easy life even when I don’t need it…a few weeks down, perhaps I would have something else to say…but for now, I am thrilled to be behind the wheel! 😀 

I’d like all the recent mommies to comment on this and help me out. Did you push your bump around? And is it okay to do so? And if yes…how can it be a guilt-free experience? 





9 thoughts on “Pushing the bump around!

  1. I can completely understand what you are going through. As I read your post my journey through pregnancy flashes back to me . I would say I was full of contradictions. Sometimes I would openly take the advantage of being a ‘Mom to be’ and sometimes deny it’s benefits vehemently. After having a little car crash in my 2nd month I stopped driving. I remember giving a hard time to my boss for more work from home days. I almost worked 5 months from home. And on the other side I made my parents and family paranoid by acting brave and not returning to India for my delivery. And to top it all I quit my job for 2 years. So I think you are far better off and believe me there is nothing to be guilty about because every mother would tread this path of change which brings in sense of power and weakness at the same time. So enjoy my dear because sleepless nights are not too far…………………

  2. Thanks Kajal! I completely believe you…this pregnancy and the soon approaching motherhood is making me sound like a bag of contradictions at times! But then I am equally humbled by the ‘sense of power’ that a woman has in her life…the weakness then sounds like a state of mind! Thank you for sharing your story…

  3. Speaking from a friends experience, she did push her ‘bump’ around and a lot ! it was fun from what i gather and to tell you the truth we reaped the benefit as well. A table was guaranteed in the busiest of restaurants with the best service 🙂 I guess there are no hard and fast rules here…i’d say push it when yo need to and tickle those (dare-I-say) feminist bones when things get too difficult to swallow.

  4. That sounds like fun Anu…I should soon come up with a situation that lets me use by bump to bully someone! :p

  5. Ok I don’t speak from experience here ( U r my 1st pregnant friend after all) but having come from a situation where people ‘make way’ for you, I’d say grab it !!! I mean, what the hell, You will soon embark on a very different journey in a couple of months with probably every decision led by what’s best for your baby. So this is the time to let go and let the others dance to your desires. There’s nothing wrong in being an opportunist and maybe selfish at times.

  6. Hi RtuparnaI pushed my bump for the whole 9 months (although the bump started showing up post 4 months). I drove my car, cooked, cleaned, exercised and pretty much did everything you can and cannot imagine. So, you have company. There is nothing wrong in expecting some consideration from fellow human beings , after all it is the bump that needs the symnpathy, not you technically :). and my philosophy is life is – If you have all the weight you need and dont need, you should throw it around! So glaring, eye-balling, ribbing – everything is IN :).These are one of the best months in life when you can do anything guilt -free and blame it on the Hormones…I nearly ate 2 chocolate cakes (1 kg each) for New Year’s when I was 7 months Pregnant :)..I even carried my hospital bag to the hospital on the day of my delivery, despite protests from husband…Did all this crazy ass stuff have any impact on my baby. Nope. She came 6 days before due date – C-Section (As madam was asleep with no intentions of coming out ever). 1 week later I was up on my feet doing pretty much everything I was doing before and now 4 months later, my bump has more or less shrunk to a point where I just need to hold my breath to fit into the old pair of jeans!..Enjoy life guilt-free and your kiddo will thank you for it!!.

  7. Hey come on.. give yourself a break.. ENJOY LIFE while you can. Give the guilt trip a holiday and make the most of your mother-to-be status. Get pampered, act fragile, take advantage. Once the kid comes along you’ll have as tough a time as you ever wanted. With twins I should know!BTW first time here.. you have a cute place.

  8. Wow! Look at the comments flowing in! 🙂 @Sonal – It’s not about being selfish really…it’s about taking advantage of my position! But yes, I like the bit about having others ‘dance to my desires’! I think I have pretty much managed to set up a dance party around me, so I am not complaining! :p@ Arch – Loved you story! So has your kid changed your theories about who you are?? @ Obsessivemom – I am enjoying every day of my life…in fact I am ready to go through pregnancy all over again! 🙂 And mind you my bundle hasn’t arrived yet! This pregnancy has already changed so many things about me, that I am sure the troubles will also come with its own set of rants! Keep following the journal (and I am following you now), I hope to see more of you around! 🙂

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