Heard about dreams during pregnancy?? If you haven’t, take a look at the following link!
Heard about dreams during pregnancy?? If you haven’t, take a look at the following link!
As a child, at least till I turned into my teens my birthday was the most special day of the year! There was all too much fuss around me and I felt at the top of the world! New clothes, shoes, fancy chocolates, a grand birthday party, a humungous birthday cake brought from Flurry’s and loads of gifts…as I grew older birthdays were fun…but became just another excuse to throw a party and dance to some silly Vengaboys number atop a water tank on my terrace! Gifts mattered little, the short skirts a lot!
My wedding was a grand, grand affair! For one who is completely opposed to fanfare and ceremonious weddings, it was quite ironical that I enjoyed every minute of the 5 day tamasha! Sleep on time, look pretty, fuss about food, what to wear etc etc…was like I was the heroine of a film and the story was being weaved around me! In fact the run up to the marriage was fun too…and like a drama queen, though I was hugely sentimental about being married / officially ‘tied’ to Aniruddha…I was a tad too sad that it was all over! The spot light stayed on the newly weds for a bit…but that too waned away! A year later as we celebrated our first anniversary of being wedded, I asked, “Do we still qualify as newly married?” Aniruddha looked at me and said, “Does it matter?”
It’s all about attention you see…of being the cynosure of my family’s attention! To be the one around whom everyone’s life moves! Now call me selfish, I have enjoyed every bit of it…I look at it as a pleasant break from all the running around that I do in my daily life! Who doesn’t like to me pampered? I’ve realised pregnancy has brought the spot light back on me! It’s like everyone has found a new purpose in life…to take care of me! The first person being the ‘father of the child’! Aniruddha has sommersaulted his life around me…his blackberry messenger has suddenly started working, and either he pings me five times a day or calls me! For one who called me his ‘bada beta’ (elder son!), this is a huge transformation! And really, while I am basking in all this husbandly – fatherly affection, I am totally loving it!
Next up the mothers in my life…the first one to see me as a new born, even before my mom was Mimi (my mother’s younger sister)! As I learnt to speak I tried to copy my neighbour call his mom ‘mummy’ and it became Mimi for Mimi! She’s the one credited with all the firsts in my life and a lot, lot more…from laying down my first wholesome meal, to handling me during my first menses, to teaching me how to eat roti, to being my closest pal through the years…I was the first child in the family who made her an aunt and we share the closest relationship ever! Mimi, even now is the first one to see me pregnant…so while she has graciously taken up the maternal role in my family now, she is doing that which she does best! She’s cooking up the world’s most amazing meals for me as I have for now retired from my own kitchen! Half of my first trimester has been spent with her…and I cannot thank her enough for doing all that she is!
Next up, my mother in law will come and stay with us…and then my mother! All when my pregnancy moves into the 2nd and 3rd trimesters…the attention is good…all good!
It’s strange what motherhood can do to you! This random play of emotions in a would-be mother’s body is quite like puberty! It’s a confusing state of mind that takes you by surprise, tosses you in the air and settles you down with a ruffled hair style! No, I am not talking about the infamous ‘mood swings’…though I by nature may be more vulnerable to raging hormones and erratic mood swings, I am happy to note as of today that they have not set in…and I really hope they don’t visit me ever!! C’mon who likes a grouchy me?
In fact this is about something more exciting…that which I have not experienced in a while now, ever since I went on a marathon weight loss regime! CRAVING…the desire to taste a certain food…a desire that excites every sense in your body, your sense of taste being the most dominant! It’s nothing less than a sudden burst of uncontrollable desire to eat a particular food item…and nothing else in the world eaten in its place can satiate you! In my case it was the gooyey, ultra soft, deliciously tantalising, sugary, syrupy and utterly delightful…rasgullas! So intense was the craving and the urge to put a delicately warmed, fresh rasgulla in my mouth that I had to step out of work, drive to the closest market, head for the ATM (yes, I didn’t have the money to satiate my instant craving), walk another 50 steps to the sweet shop that I had never visited before and buy myself the only sweet that would pacify that burning desire in my soul!
For people who know me well…you know how weird this sounds! I, and mishti!! But since this was my very first craving…it was special…very special!
We talked…and talked…and talked again! While I was nervously excited about the baby growing within me, I was equally paranoid about a thousand things! Is this the right time? There is still so much that I wanted to do! We’re married just two years, isn’t it a bit too early?? How will I handle the baby with no help? I am barely able to run the house with an office to go to, how will I handle the baby now? Will I be okay being a stay at home mother for the first six months? Will I turn into a demanding nagging wife, looking at blaming her husband for getting her bumped before her time? Is Aniruddha ready? Am I really really ready for this?
*waves her hand in the air*
You get the picture? A perfectly planned event pre-poned without warning isn’t a good thing for the nerves! And I blame it on my raging hormones at the moment that I suddenly got worked up with a lot of anxiety…I really needed some time out to have a sane conversation with myself! Thankfully I did…and the answers came soon enough…
Q – Is this the right time?
A – Have I not answered surprise tests before? Have I not taken an untrodden path before? I have never been scared…so why now? I wasn’t planning for it…it was designed to be this way! I may not know, but perhaps, this is the right time!
Review of the A above – Okay, this is sounds highly spiritual and very unlike me…but what the hell…now the whole world knows how ‘traditional’ I feel about it!
Q – There is still so much that I wanted to do! We’re married just two years, isn’t it a bit too early??
A – Mmmmm…how long have we been together?? Ten years…we’ve had our roller coaster rides! Time for responsibility!
Review of the A above – uh hello! Why does a baby have to change my relationship with my husband?? May sound idealist to all those who have experienced a change…but I know ‘us’…we won’t change!
Q – How will I handle the baby with no help? I am barely able to run the house with an office to go to, how will I handle the baby now?
A – Get help! A house maid, for 24 hours…who will help me run the house and handle the baby when the time comes!
Review of the A above – It’s easier said than executed! I am still running around to find one…damn those commission hungry agents!!
Q – Will I be okay being a stay at home mother for the first six months?
A – “Take a break girl…you need it!!”
Review of the A above – I still believe that!
Q – Will I turn into a demanding nagging wife, looking at blaming her husband for getting her bumped before her time?
A – No! As long as he remains the lovable adorable husband that he promised to be whenever I become pregnant!
Review of the A above – I have fallen in love all over again!!! 😀
Q – Is Aniruddha ready?
A – Oh boy! Yes he is…
Review of the A above – He is the one who has told more people…I am still holding my horses!
Q – Am I really really ready for this?
A – I am born ready!
Review of the A above – Maybe not born…but growing everyday with the baby! I am a little more ready today than I was yesterday!
That’s what I thought when I first discovered I am pregnant! We hadn’t been planning…I mean we had planned it for next year, since we wanted a late 2012 baby…but then is it this easy to get bumped without even ‘trying’ for it??!! C’mon…we haven’t been even living together for the past two months!! With wheels on our heels, Aniruddha and I have been zipping in and out of town for a while now! And without getting into details of our ‘private’ lives here, all I can really say that we haven’t been really really working too hard!!
I’ve heard of too many tales of couples in their 30’s trying for a baby…and to be honest I was ready to be one of them, and not just because I was battling my mother’s concern of having a late baby, but because I knew I didn’t have the healthiest body to conceive without a lot many hits! So hit and trial is what I was mentally prepared for…! So you can imagine my shock and disbelief when I discovered the double lines in the home pregnancy kit! I was anyways too sleepy in the morning, but those two distinct lines really woke me up! Next up, was a phone call that I had to make…to the father of my child and break him the news!
The father was on his way to work…and until then I was trying to control my breathing and sound normal, my heart was jumping a beat to hear the voice on the other end! And the reaction was just the same… “hmm…how??” Thank God, for an understanding husband…a doubting Thomas would have asked for a DNA test! The next step was to go for a doc’s check up…just to make sure that we weren’t getting worked up for nothing! An USG confirmed a 5week + pregnancy and both of us again did our math! We decided to keep it to ourselves for a while…but that ‘while’ wasn’t too long!